Wow.
Frank Ocean comes out and I am so happy I could scream.
I grew up with a gay brother who came out when he was 14 and I was 7, so the Gay Community has been close to me for a very long time (so close that, although I am straight, I feel included in the Gay Community). When our abusive father figured it out, it was tragic and heartbreaking – to say the least. I could re-count some tales, but it’s neither here nor there. My brother ended up running away at such a young age, learning life on the street.
Our relationship didn’t end. He would come back to hang out with me, his beloved little sister…spoiling me with gifts and teaching me about the world. He would take me to Pride Parades, sneak me into gay clubs and take me on dates with him to the movies and strolling the mall. At a young age, I experienced what it was like for two people of the same sex to genuinely love each other.
I also experienced hate first hand, having kids in class make fun of you for having a gay brother and have yet another reason to bully you. I also experienced what it was like second hand to be persecuted for your sexuality, having people angrily yell names at him, do hateful things – and worst crimes of them  all of them all, having your own father throw you out of the house as a child and ultimately reject you (something that no child can ever recover from).
It only made me stronger and made me want to champion the community (and all “under dogs” more).
It’s really strange that I’ve made a name for myself in the Hip Hop Community which publicly has zero tolerance for Homosexuality – (despite my “gaydar” reading off the charts with most of the people in it). I’ve felt strongly about this forever and quite frankly, I hate it. In general, while it’s a community the world loves (and thankfully has embraced me)  it’s also a community that is not open to things that are different – let alone gay.
Now that Frank Ocean has come out – I am ecstatic, overjoyed, overwhelmed, in tears. I am happy he has found the strength to come out in the poetic and lovely way that he did (FRANKOCEAN.TUMBLR). I ‘m sure he has battled with some demons over the past few years and to be able to let it out must feel fantastic. I know he didn’t expect or probably want to be a martyr for the cause, he probably just wanted to let it out in the open…but, the world will rush to his aid.
Do you know what this means for the world & the Hip Hop Community? Do you know how this will change everything? He’s giving young men and women the strength and courage to come out, to know that they are not alone…not to be afraid. If you’re gay or you’ve shared the struggle with someone  who was gay (out or not), you know what kind of afraid I’m talking about…its debilitating.
If only right now I was 7 and my brother was 14 and this was all happening. It could have changed, in the least, how my brother felt about himself even if my father still couldn’t accept it. He would have felt like he wasn’t alone. Although we can’t turn back the hands of time, I’m thinking about the other little girls out there now with big brothers (or sisters, cousins, friends, etc) who are coming out, knowing that this Tumblr post has created a domino effect…ultimately changing the way we all think.
How revolutionary! How progressive!
I walk away from reading Frank Ocean’s post feeling like he just wanted to be honest. That is triumphantly inspiring. Gay or not, this will impact all of our lives. This will all make us a bit more honest about who we are – and we could all use more of that.
Thank you Frank Ocean.
xo, va$htie.
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im proud of frank its takes true courage to come out, let alone while in the spotlight with millions of people watching and listening to what you say. much respect for him.
I have so much admiration for Frank and his courage ! I only wish someone close to me had the courage to be open about his sexuality and know that his true friends would have been there to support him RIP Louis X
Can only give Frank the respect he deserves. Considering the spotlight he's in and just everything around him I can only imagine how much of a burden this was for him.. But I now know he's feels liberated and proud, and I cannot wait for Channel Orange.
Such a great piece Vashtie. And I could not agree more, this will change the lives of so many people. This will change the outcome for so many wanting to admit their true feelings to their peers. He has made the world, especially the Hip-Hop world, a slightly more accepting place for the gay community. Not only that, but i respect him for talking about his first experience with love, that was brave.
Whether it's Adam and Eve or Adam and Steve - Love is love. I respect any one brave enough to fall into it. --http://bit.ly/N7eJ28
So beautifully written. I'm so proud of him.
wow good luck and thanks for sharing ur story vash
Great post Vashtie. Personally i feel like the tide is (finally) shifting and the collective consciousness is finally raising from us acting as human-doings to really becoming human-beings. Being honest, Being authentic, Being oneself. Those are parts of the person that can be done solely through BEHAVIOUR (tho religious folks seem to think so). It comes from the soul. And im so happy that this generation of artists have that freedom (tho still tough) to give voice to this aspect of themselves. Being a kid in the 80s and a teen in the 90s these kinds of conversations were not being had except the "dont be that way". And perhaps for Frank but I definetly felt the fear and also the SHAME of having an attraction to the same gender. That aspect of your personality can really make one really wanna check outta here (as many do) if it isnt being reinforced by love. I was too chicken but i did have a knife in hand about to do it at 14. (Something about that age).
Frank is a special soul. Who knows where his career will go, he's still gotta deal with the vicissitudes of being in the music biz but at least for young men in their 20's they have a face that looks like them, dresses like them and can make that one aspect of themselves they may have struggled with seem less weird, but possibly even cool.
(forgive my typos..lol)
wow, thank you all for sharing!!!
lovely post vashtie.
idk if i'd be so quick to label him as gay or even bi for that matter. he shared a personal story about a time when he fell in love with someone. someone who happened to be a man. he himself never used the words gay or bisexual. it was simply him telling the world he once fell in love with a man. where that places him on the sexual orientation spectrum is none of my, or our concern. idk i see him as the type of person who falls in love with the PERSON. whether that person be male or female is irrelevant. idk im just weary of labeling (something he isnt particularly fond of, especially when it comes to his music "genre") him as gay if thats not even a label he would give himself. idk why im posting this here either but so many people have been quick to call this a "coming out" and marking him as some gay matyr. what i do know is that his beautiful story is very real and something that im sure tons of kids will find comfort in as they too have experienced it. he is truly is brave and inspiring soul for sharing something so personal. anyway im rambling. bye.
thank you for this vashtie